Psychologists about pride. How to get rid of pride - advice from a psychologist Psychological articles about pride

Before we begin discussing how to get rid of pride, let’s first understand this concept itself. This word usually means excessive pride, arrogance, selfishness, arrogance, etc. Everyone roughly knows what pride is, but rarely does anyone recognize it in themselves, and if they notice it, they do not see any danger in it and, moreover, are not going to fight it. But sooner or later it will make itself felt and bear its terrible fruits.

How to get rid of pride: Orthodoxy, Catholicism

Pride in Orthodoxy is one of the eight sinful passions, along with gluttony, fornication, greed, anger, sadness, despondency and vanity.

In Catholicism, pride is one of the seven main sinful passions, along with gluttony, fornication, greed, anger, despondency and envy.

Before answering the question of how to get rid of the sin of pride, it should be noted that they are not at all the same thing. Pride is, in general, the most common characteristic of any sinner. We all fall into the same from time to time - this is that great degree when this sinful passion turns into a dominant characteristic of the personality and fills it. These people usually don’t listen to anyone, they say about such people: “There is a lot of pride, but little intelligence.”

Islam is about pride

Pride is when a person boasts about his achievements before the Creator, forgetting that it was from Him that he received them. This disgusting quality makes a person too arrogant; he begins to believe that he himself can achieve everything without God’s help, and therefore he never thanks God for everything he has.

How to get rid of pride? Islam, by the way, also holds the opinion that pride is a great sin, which becomes the cause of a number of other sins.

According to the Koran, a genie named Iblis refused to carry out Allah's order and prostrate to Adam. The genie said that he was better than man because he was made of fire, not clay. After this, he was cast out of heaven and vowed to lead believers astray.

How to recognize the sin of pride? How to get rid of it?

Pride grows in the soil of prosperity, and not when everything is bad. In euphoria it is almost impossible to notice. But once it grows, it will be very difficult to stop it. She plunges a person into the illusion of her greatness and then suddenly throws him into the abyss. Therefore, it is better to notice it earlier, recognize it and, accordingly, begin an uncompromising fight against it. Let's pay attention to the signs of its manifestation.

An indication of pride

  • Frequent touchiness and intolerance towards other people, or rather towards their imperfections.
  • Constantly blaming others for your life problems.
  • Uncontrolled irritability and disrespect for other people.
  • Constant thoughts about your own greatness and uniqueness, and therefore superiority over others.
  • The need for someone to constantly admire and praise you.
  • Absolute intolerance to criticism and unwillingness to correct one’s shortcomings.
  • Inability to ask for forgiveness.
  • Complete confidence in one's own infallibility; the desire to argue and prove one’s merits.
  • Lack of humility and stubbornness, which lies in the fact that a person cannot accept the lessons of fate with dignity and calm.

When pathos grows, the joy in the heart fades and is replaced by dissatisfaction and dissatisfaction. Only some people, noticing all these negative signs of pride in themselves, begin to resist, while others become its victims.

You can deal with pride before it grows to gigantic proportions, figuratively speaking, before it takes power over your soul and mind. And we need to urgently get down to business, but how to deal with pride?

Fighting methods

  1. No matter how high your achievements are, you should try to be interested in people who have achieved more, whom you should respect and learn from.
  2. Learn humility, realize the greatness and infinite potential of every human soul. Accept your insignificance before God - the creator of all life on earth and in heaven.
  3. Don't take credit for all the credit and achievements. Always thank the Lord for everything good and bad that happens to you, for various trials and lessons. The feeling of gratitude is always more pleasant to experience than the feeling of contempt for others.
  4. Find an adequate, honest and good person so that he can constructively express his opinion about you; all noticed shortcomings must be worked out and eradicated. And this is the best cure for pride.
  5. You need to pass on your best experience to people, try to help them selflessly with love. Showing true love will definitely cleanse your heart of pride. Anyone who does not start sharing their positive experiences with others in time will only increase the growth of pride and pseudo-greatness.
  6. Try to be sincere and first of all to yourself. Look for kindness in yourself, so that you have the opportunity not to accumulate grievances, but to find the strength and courage to ask for forgiveness from those we have offended and learn to admit our mistakes.

Self-deprecation

Many are interested in another interesting question - how to get rid of pride and two extreme points, one concept implies high self-esteem, the other - low self-esteem. Let's talk about it a little.

If we already know about pride, then let’s dwell a little on such a property as self-abasement, which is based on incorrect self-esteem and negative self-analysis. A person begins to belittle himself and his merits in comparison with other people. He may not like his appearance and qualities, he constantly criticizes himself, saying, “I’m not handsome,” “I’m fat,” “I’m a slob,” “I’m a complete fool,” etc.

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Self-deprecation, like pride, can be used as a tool to influence how others evaluate and perceive you, so as not to take a painful blow to your self-esteem.

In a situation of belittling oneself, a person is the first to begin to criticize, scold and reproach himself, thereby preempting possible negative reactions to him from others. Such people truly believe that they are worse than those around them. Shyness also shows a developed inferiority complex in a person.

Causes of self-deprecation

Where does it come from? Usually this may be some negative experience from early childhood associated with the inability to evaluate oneself and others.

Self-deprecation becomes an inadequate way to protect against potential emotional threats. It can be used as a mask that a person puts on in adulthood in order to hide behind it.

Self-deprecation, as a rule, really appears from early childhood, often due to the child’s inability to meet all the high standards and expectations of the parents, especially if the parents are some outstanding people. They expect that their child must certainly meet their ideals, have talents and ambitious aspirations.

Mask of Powerlessness

But the child does not reach the bar set by his parents, then he blames himself, considers himself mediocre, and incorrect self-esteem comes to his mind, because his parents are unhappy with him.

When a child grows up, that’s when the fear appears that he will never be able to be as good as many people around him, that they cannot like him, and therefore success, happiness and love will never come to him. He begins to openly declare that he is a loser. A deep internal conflict is brewing and a chain of complexes is formed that hide under a mask that means “don’t pay any attention to me” and “don’t expect anything special from me.” He is not used to praise and does not accept it because he does not believe in himself.

Vanity

At the same time, another question arises - how to get rid of pride and vanity. And these are all links of one chain. Where there is pride, vanity appears. The meaning of this concept is that a person constantly wants to look better than he actually is, he feels a constant need to confirm his superiority, which means he surrounds himself with flattering friends.

Related concepts of vanity also include pride, pride, arrogance, arrogance and “star fever”. A vain person is only interested in his person.

Vanity is like a drug, without which those who become addicted to it will no longer be able to live. And envy immediately settles in next to each other, and they go hand in hand. Since a vain person does not tolerate any competition, if someone is ahead of him, black envy begins to gnaw at him.

Perishable glory

As mentioned above, vanity, along with pride, is one of the eight sinful passions in Orthodoxy.

I would also like to add to everything that vanity is when a person constantly strives for vain, that is, vain and empty glory. The word “vain,” in turn, means “quickly passing and perishable.”

Position, high position, fame - things on earth are short-lived and unreliable. Any earthly glory is ashes and dust, simply nothing compared to the glory that the Lord has prepared for His loving children.

Arrogance

Now we need to talk about how to get rid of pride and arrogance. You need to find out right away, then it will be easier to understand and cope with this passion. Arrogance is exaltation of oneself, arrogance and contemptuous attitude towards another person.

Summarizing the discussion of how to get rid of pride, arrogance and the like, it should be noted that the fight against them is possible only after a person takes strict control of his behavior and words, begins to do good deeds, and takes care of as much as possible people around you and don’t expect gratitude or payment for it.

We must try to get rid of the thought of our own importance, specialness and greatness. Look at yourself from the outside, listen to what you say, what you think, how you behave, put yourself in the shoes of others.

Pride, arrogance and vanity will prevent an individual from living an independent and fulfilling life. And before they destroy you, start fighting them. Only then will you be able to rejoice and live in peace with yourself and with the world around you. And you will no longer want to blame anyone for your sins, and you will have a desire to thank the Lord for everything.

The world will shine with different colors, only then can a person comprehend the main thing: the meaning of life is LOVE. And only for her should he strive.

Human pride is how much the human soul

different from God's plan.

Aleksey Ivanov. Gold of rebellion, or down the river gorges.

Pride as a personality quality is a tendency to show unhealthy attention to oneself, a desire for glory, excessively inflated, unfounded pride exclusively in oneself, to strive to rise above others or to fall below others.

Arriving at one of the London hotels, Mark Twain saw in the book of arrivals a note: “Lord L. with valet.” The writer, in turn, wrote: “Mark Twain with a suitcase.”

Many years ago the devil decided to sell all the tools of his trade. He carefully displayed them in a glass display case for everyone to see. What a collection it was! There was a shiny dagger of Envy, and next to it was the hammer of Wrath. On another shelf lay the bow of Passion, and next to it the poisoned arrows of Gluttony, Lust and Jealousy were picturesquely placed. A huge set of networks of Lies was exhibited at a separate stand. There were also weapons of Dejection, Covetousness and Hatred. They were all beautifully presented and labeled with the name and price. And on the most beautiful shelf, separate from all the other instruments, lay a small, unsightly and rather shabby-looking wooden wedge, on which hung the label “Pride.” Surprisingly, the price of this instrument was higher than all the others combined. One passer-by asked the devil why he valued this strange wedge so dearly, and he replied: “I really value it above all others, because it is the only tool in my arsenal that I can rely on if all others fail.” And he tenderly stroked the wooden wedge. If I manage to drive this wedge into a person’s head,” the devil continued, “it opens the door for all other tools.

Pride is the queen of vices. Any human vices grow from pride. Envy, anger, greed, selfishness, selfishness have its source. She is the mother of arrogance, arrogance, obstinacy, arrogance, and vanity. For example, a person becomes a slave to greed not because he wants to be rich, he wants to be richer than everyone else. If someone has more happiness in life, envy flares up. If someone does not behave as pride would like, resentment, anger and anger arise. Therefore, pride has the unconditional first place on the pedestal of vices.

USA. Our intelligence officer is sitting with an agent on a bench. He says: “Listen, I gave you secret information!” What, am I a spy?! Ours reassures: “You have a lot of pride.” I’m the spy... And you’re just a traitor...

A woman comes to confession and says: Oh! I am the most fallen of all women. The most fallen! And he hears in response: You are not the most fallen. You are simply fallen!

Pride in a person is the idea that I am perfect, but the world is not perfect. A person infected with the virus of pride stands on the platform not of a Student learning the lessons of life, but of a Teacher who wants to control the behavior of others, teach them, impose his ideas and principles on them. The attitude of pride is to let imperfect life unconditionally accept my perfect leadership. Therefore, a proud person believes that it is not himself that needs to be changed, but the world and other people. Miguel no Unamuno writes: “To demand from someone that he become different is the same as demanding from him that he stop being himself. Every personality preserves itself, allowing changes in its way of thinking and being only if these changes can fit into the unity and continuity of its spiritual life.”

The foundation of pride is the feeling that there is no Higher Power in the world, there is no energy of love and prosperity, there is no higher principle, an absolute. There is only a perfect Self and an imperfect life. Therefore, you need to work well with your elbows, go towards the goal, regardless of the means, you need to fight and fight for your place in the sun. Life is perceived by pride as a kind of aggressive space and therefore it is necessary to go to the “battering ram”, attack, tear everyone like Tuzik a rag. Pride is based on fear of life.

It is nothing other than pride that provokes a person to harm other living beings and even commit murder. Pride whispers to the mind: “I am higher than these insignificant people, therefore I have the right to decide their destinies.” The bearer of pride is always unconsciously, against his will, aggressive. He does not think about others, the main thing is that he is comfortable. A person blinded by pride shows conceit, arrogance, and rashness, believing that his every thought is the absolute truth in the last instance. This causes a lot of mistakes and miscalculations. Georgians have a good proverb: “He who raises his head stumbles.” A proud person begins to get nervous and angry at others, causing them suffering.

Pride is all the vices in one, that is, it is a collective quality of personality. It is no coincidence that the church considers pride a mortal sin. Henry Lyon Oldie in his book “Child of the Ecumene” writes: “Cruelty is the reverse side of resentment. Hatred is the reverse side of weakness. Pity is the reverse side of looking in the mirror. Aggression is the rear of pride. Now let's take all this - plus much more - divide it into paper lots, throw it into a hat, shake it, mix it well and start drawing tickets in a different order. Do you think something will change? Nothing like this".

All classifications are conditional and, nevertheless, we will try to break down the vices - derivatives of pride - into certain groups. So, in the first group we will place personality traits that manifest a constant desire to exalt oneself or to humiliate oneself excessively in front of people. This is arrogance, arrogance, arrogance, conceit, arrogance, obstinacy, narcissism, conceit, complacency, self-abasement, arrogance, superiority. The second group of personality traits is associated with a person’s desire have more than others. These are greed, greed, lust, lust, sensuality, envy, dissatisfaction with life, discontent. The third group of personality traits is associated with the manifestation of inclinations a person to go into the outside world with his elbows outstretched, to “ram”, in a frontal attack, trying to realize his desires to the detriment of the intentions of others. This is selfishness, greed, impudence, arrogance, rudeness, rudeness, tactlessness, bad manners, discourtesy, disrespect, shamelessness, shamelessness, swagger, licentiousness, lack of culture. In the fourth group of qualities associated with the desire for fame, vanity, boasting, arrogance, unhealthy ambition, excessive ambition, immodesty, and star fever are huddled together. The fifth group represents a delegation of personality traits, secretly demonstrating a person’s desire to be above others. This is hypocrisy, hypocrisy, deceit, treachery, gossip, slander, sycophancy, flattery, deceit, secrecy, denunciation.

The English philosopher Francis Bacon noted: “Pride is devoid of the best quality of vices - it is incapable of hiding.” Indeed, many vices can be hidden. Voluptuousness can be indulged in secret, hypocrisy can be covered up with ostentatious virtue. A bad partisan out of pride. Having so many vices at her core, she, even possessing phenomenal artistry, is unable to hide her predatory grin from the eyes of others. A proud man “isn’t worth a penny, he looks like a ruble,” but everyone understands that people like him are worth a nickel for a bunch on market day. A German proverb says: “Stupidity and pride grow on the same tree.”

According to what signs Is pride calculated? There are quite a lot of signs. If we analyze each one separately, we will need a whole book, so we will limit ourselves to simply listing them: confidence that you are always right; patronizing and looking down on others; excessive sense of self-importance; humiliation of oneself and others; unforgiveness of oneself and others; the thought that you are better than others; attributing to oneself the works and merits of other people; the ability to put an opponent at a disadvantage; control over the situation without taking responsibility for it; arrogant attitude, vanity, desire to often look in the mirror; flaunting wealth, clothing, etc.; not allowing others to help themselves, unwillingness to work together with others; attracting attention; talkativeness, talking about one's problems; touchiness; excessive sensitivity or insensitivity; thoughts about what others think and say about you, excessive preoccupation with oneself; using words that listeners obviously do not understand; feeling of worthlessness; refusal to change or the idea that it is not worth changing; division of people into hierarchical levels, behavior in accordance with the hierarchy; thoughts that you are more important than others when doing specific work; work beyond measure; distrust of God and people; creating an idol from oneself and from others; ingratitude; neglect of small people; inattention; unawareness of one's pride and spiritual problems; the presence of an irritable tone; the thought of teaching someone a lesson; disobedience to the will of God; lack of self-esteem; recklessness and thoughtlessness; dishonesty towards oneself and others; inability to compromise; the desire to always have the last word; reluctance to share your knowledge; inattention to the physical body or excessive attention to it; the idea of ​​having to save others from their problems.

Pride, giving rise to selfishness, blocks the mind. Man considers himself the center of the Universe, he already knows everything. You have to forget about personal growth. Academician Pavlov said: “Never think that you already know everything. And no matter how highly they rate you, always have the courage to say to yourself: I am ignorant. Don't let pride take over you. Because of it you will persist where you need to agree, because of it you will refuse useful advice and friendly assistance, because of it you will lose faith in objectivity.

There is such a wonderful parable:

I asked God to take away my pride
And God told me: "no"
He said that pride is not taken away. They refuse it.

I asked God to heal my bedridden daughter,
And God told me: "no"
He said that her soul is eternal, but her body will die anyway.

I asked God to grant me patience
And God told me: "no"
He said that patience is the result of trials.
It is not given, but deserved.

I asked God to give me happiness
And God told me: "no"
He said he was giving a blessing
Whether I will be happy at the same time depends on me.

I asked you to save me from pain,
And God said no
He said that suffering separates a person from worldly concerns
And they bring him closer

I asked God for spiritual growth,
And God said no
He said that the spirit must grow itself,
And He will only cut me off,
to make it bear fruit.

I asked God to help me love others the same way
How He loves me
And God said: “Finally, you understand what you need to ask for”….

I asked for strength
and God sent me trials to strengthen me...
I asked for wisdom
and God sent me problems,
which have to be broken
head...
I asked for courage
and God sent me danger...
I asked for love
and God sent me those who needed my help...
I asked for blessings
and God gave me opportunities...
I didn't receive anything I asked for.
I got everything I needed.
God answered my prayers.

Writer Vladimir Rybin in the novel “The Kiss of Judas” writes in the context of pride: “... Abandon pride, do not imagine yourself as God. Because you haven't been given enough. But in the little that is given to you, you must be God. For you were created by God in His image and likeness.

Give up your pride. But also reject self-deprecation. God does not need nonentities who humiliate themselves. Even by fasting and prayer. Fasting and prayer so that you do not forget about your destiny to do the will of God. So that in the little that is given to you, you create, create, enriching yourself and people, the world. Not recognizing and ruining this little thing given to you is failure to fulfill God’s will...

Satan says, "You are a worm." The divinity inherent in you insists: “You are the likeness of God!”

Live with pride, but not with pride. Be a creator and learn to see the creator in everyone. And do, do, don’t talk. Reasoning is only a prelude to the matter. Remember the Gospel: “Prayer without works is dead.” And don’t put it off until later, don’t forget Hamlet’s lesson: “Plans perish from long delays” ...”

Pride mows down all people indiscriminately, but it especially favors people who have achieved power or inherited it. All royalty have pride. Even the father of Peter the Great, Russian Tsar Alexei Mikhailovich, nicknamed the Quietest, did not shy away from pride. Historian N.I. Kostomarov gave him the following description: “The friendly, affectionate tsar valued the greatness of his royal power, his autocratic dignity: it captivated and satisfied him. He delighted in his high-profile titles and was ready to shed blood for them. The slightest accidental failure to comply with the correctness of titles was considered an important criminal offense... The Tsar appeared to the people only solemnly. For example, he is riding in a wide sleigh: two boyars stand on both sides of this sleigh, two on the back; the sleigh is escorted by detachments of archers. They sweep the street in front of the Tsar and disperse the people... Muscovites considered it prudent to hide in the house when the Tsar passed..."

Peter Kovalev

Human! It's great! It sounds... proud!

M. Gorky “At the Bottom”

“You take yourself too seriously,” don Juan said slowly. - And you perceive yourself as a damn important person. This needs to change! After all, you are so important that you consider yourself entitled to be irritated for any reason. So important that you can afford to turn around and leave when the situation doesn’t turn out the way you want. Perhaps you believe that by doing so you are demonstrating your strength of character. But this is nonsense! You are a weak, arrogant and narcissistic guy!
K. Castaneda. "Journey to Ixtlan"

What do we know about pride?

This feeling, recognized as base by many religious and philosophical concepts, has a huge number of manifestations in everyday life. What is the norm of behavior for a modern person, and is often encouraged by society, has been a reason to work on oneself for a long time.

The most ancient collections of wisdom that have survived to this day, the Vedas, contain forty signs of pride, and many of them can easily be detected in the composition of their personality by almost every person.


Surprisingly, in the following signs, we will not find a prejudiced attitude in the modern world: some are exalted as virtues, others are preached as gender characteristics of behavior, but, unfortunately, few can be considered an extra burden that is worth getting rid of:

  • I am always right.
  • Patronizing and looking down on others.
  • A sense of self-importance.
  • Humiliation of yourself and others.
  • Thoughts that you are better than others.
  • Boasting.
  • The ability to put an opponent at a disadvantage.
  • Control over the situation, but unwillingness to take responsibility.
  • Arrogant attitude, vanity, desire to look in the mirror.
  • Flaunting wealth, clothing, etc.
  • Not allowing others to help themselves and work with others.
  • Take on overwhelming work.
  • Work without measure.
  • Attracting attention to yourself.
  • Touchiness.
  • Excessive talkativeness or talking about your problems.
  • Excessive sensitivity or insensitivity.
  • Excessive preoccupation with oneself.
  • Thoughts about what others think and say about you.
  • Using words that the audience doesn't know or understand, and you know it.
  • Feeling of worthlessness.
  • Unforgiveness of yourself and others.
  • Creating an idol from yourself and from others.
  • Changing behavior depending on who we are talking to.
  • Ingratitude.
  • Ignoring small people.
  • Inattention (while studying sastras).
  • The presence of an irritable tone.
  • Raising the voice in anger and frustration.
  • Disobedience to the will of God, Guru, Sadhus, Shastra.
  • Lack of self-esteem.
  • Recklessness and madness.
  • Dishonesty towards yourself and others
  • Inability to compromise.
  • The desire to always have the last word.
  • Reluctance to share your knowledge in order to control the situation.
  • Inattention or excessive attention to the physical body.
  • Thoughts about the need to solve other people's problems.
  • Prejudice towards people based on their appearance.
  • Excessive self-respect.
  • Sarcasm, humor, the desire to prick another, joke, laugh at another.

Pride in yoga practice has its manifestations. Often, having achieved some spiritual experience or siddhi, a person becomes swollen with arrogance and pride. He thinks too much about himself, sets himself apart from others, treats others with contempt, and cannot communicate normally. If one is endowed with moral virtues such as the spirit of service, self-sacrifice or brahmacharya, such a disciple may declare: “I have been observing brahmacharya for twelve years, who could be purer than me? For four years I ate leaves and roots, for ten years I worked selflessly in the ashram. No one demonstrated such service except me.”


Laymen are swaggeringly proud of their wealth, and sadhus and disciples are proud of their moral virtues. There is an opinion that pride is a serious obstacle on the path, a condition associated with blocking the Vishuddha chakra. If you do not try to overcome pride, and keep it for yourself as a reward for your work, then Vishuddha will be the limit to which the practitioner’s energy can rise along Sushumna. In turn, the harmonization of all chakras will enable the practitioner to concentrate his energy in the area of ​​the upper centers, which will make the practice of self-knowledge more effective.

Why should you strive to get rid of pride?

Pride, the sense of self-importance, is the source of harmful thoughts and emotions. When a person puts himself above or below someone, he begins to condemn, despise, hate, get irritated, and make claims. The feeling of one's own superiority over others gives rise to arrogance and the desire to humiliate by word, thought or deed. A sense of self-importance gives rise to subconscious aggression towards the world. A feeling of pride means that a person places himself above the Universe and God. He does not want to accept situations that do not correspond to his expectations, he considers his understanding of the world to be the most correct, and strives to subjugate the world around him. The inconsistency with his ideas about what the world around him should be causes a surge of aggressive emotions in his soul: anger, resentment, hatred, contempt, envy, pity.

Pride- this is, first of all, the result of a lack of understanding of one’s true place in the Universe, one’s purpose in this life, a lack of awareness of the purpose and meaning of life. All the energy of a person filled with pride goes into direct or indirect proof of his rightness, into fighting the world around him. This is as absurd as if a cell began to fight with the entire organism and defend its interests, regardless of the interests of the entire organism.

Pride, like any other human behavior, has its own positive intention: it is the desire for perfection, and the desire to feel calm and comfortable, and the desire to declare oneself to the whole world. Every person wants to feel that he lives in this world for a reason, that there is some meaning in his life, that his inner world has a right to exist. But to feel your value and exclusivity due to your elevation above others means wanting to destroy the worlds of other people, their uniqueness. After all, if one is better and higher, then others are worse and lower. But in fact, on a subtle level, we are all equal. Not wanting to accept the world of another person, we make our own world poor and wretched.

How to free yourself from pride?

To love and accept the world as it is, without judging, comparing or blaming anyone, including yourself. You should learn to accept any situation in your life without complaints or offense, and to thank life for events, no matter how negative they may seem at first glance. The well-known saying: “Everything that is done is for the better,” most fully reveals the whole essence of what is happening in life. The positive aspects in any situation are sometimes obvious, and sometimes hidden from our consciousness, and understanding the lesson comes later.


But sometimes it happens that a person cannot overcome this limitation of his inner world on his own. And at such a moment, it is very important to be able to hear the “senior comrades”. Those who have already overcome such mental obscurations and are moving further on the Path of self-knowledge.

But the most effective method of curbing your pride is, of course, service. Service in the full sense of the word. Service, not only to your loved ones and acquaintances, but service to society, service to the World. Try to do something every day not only for yourself, but also for those around you. And you will see how the World around you will immediately begin to change.

It is not for nothing that the sages of the past commanded us: “Change yourself - the world around you will change.”

And yet, pride, especially at the beginning of the journey, is a powerful incentive to move forward and a serious assistant in the fight against obstacles. Pride in one’s own merits in asanas and pranayamas will allow the practitioner not to stop there and move forward in mastering them. Pride from pacifying the flesh in food and pleasure will not allow you to break at the first fleeting desire. And even pride from moral virtues will be the engine at the beginning of the practitioner’s path.

It is easier to perceive pride as a stage in a person’s personal, internal evolution, helping him at the beginning and dying out as unnecessary during development.

Each person lives in his own world and creates his own unique world. This is what determines the exclusivity and individuality of any creature. Let's imagine the human body. There are trillions of different cells in it, and together they are united by life, the desire for the whole, and service to the one. At this level, all cells are equal to each other, there are no better or worse cells.

Any organism is a deeply balanced system. All cells are interconnected, but at the same time, each cell is unique in its own way, as it carries out its specific functions for the benefit of the whole organism. And if the cell copes with its duties perfectly, then it receives from the body everything it needs. Every living creature and object is a particle of the Universe. Here everyone is equal, everything in this world is united by one common goal - the desire for the Whole: God, the Universe, the Supreme Mind. Everyone makes their own unique contribution to the general universal process of development, we are all moving in the same direction, but each on our own path. It is very important for a person to feel his value, importance and uniqueness in this world, but not by elevating himself above others, because each person and object is important in his own way, but by realizing his uniqueness in the single organism of the Universe.


Pride is a feeling of superiority of one’s own person over others. This is an inadequate assessment of personal worth. It often leads to making stupid mistakes that hurt others. Pride manifests itself in arrogant disrespect for other people and their lives and problems. People with a sense of pride brag about their life achievements. They define their own success by personal aspirations and efforts, not noticing God’s help in obvious life circumstances, and do not recognize the support of other people.

The Latin term for pride is “superbia.” Pride is a mortal sin for the reason that all qualities inherent in a person are from the Creator. Seeing yourself as the source of all achievements in life and believing that everything around you is the fruit of your own labors is completely wrong. Criticism of others and discussion of their inadequacy, ridicule of failures - strokes the pride of people with pride.

Signs of pride

The conversations of such people are based on “I” or “MY”. A manifestation of pride is the world in the eyes of the proud, which is divided into two unequal halves - “He” and everyone else. Moreover, “everyone else” in comparison with him is an empty place, unworthy of attention. If we remember “everyone else”, then only for comparison, in a light favorable to pride - stupid, ungrateful, wrong, weak, and so on.

Pride in psychology

Pride can be a sign of poor upbringing. In childhood, parents are able to inspire their child that he is the best. It is necessary to praise and support a child - but for specific, not fictitious reasons, and to reward with false praise - to form pride, a personality with high self-esteem. Such people do not know how to analyze their shortcomings. They did not hear criticism as children and are not able to perceive it in adulthood.

Pride often destroys relationships—it is unpleasant to communicate with someone who is proud. Initially, not many people like feeling an order of magnitude inferior, listening to arrogant monologues, and not wanting to make compromise decisions. Stricken by pride, he does not recognize the talents and abilities of another person. If such things are openly noticed in society or company, then the proud one will publicly refute them and deny them in every possible way.

What is pride in Orthodoxy?

In Orthodoxy, pride is considered the main sin; it becomes the source of other mental vices: vanity, greed, resentment. The foundation on which the salvation of the human soul is built is the Lord, above all. Then you need to love your neighbor, sometimes sacrificing your own interests. But spiritual pride does not recognize debts to others; the feeling of compassion is alien to it. The virtue that eradicates pride is humility. It manifests itself in patience, prudence, and obedience.

What is the difference between pride and arrogance?

Pride and arrogance have different meanings and manifest themselves in a person’s character according to different characteristics. Pride is a feeling of joy for specific, justified reasons. She does not minimize or demean other people's interests. Pride is a boundary; it denotes life values, reflects the inner world, and allows a person to sincerely rejoice at the achievements of other people. Pride makes a person a slave to his own principles:

forces you to build relationships based on the principle of inequality; does not forgive mistakes; has a grudge; does not recognize human talents; tends to self-affirmation on the work of others; does not allow a person to learn from his own mistakes.

Causes of pride

Modern society forms the opinion that a woman can do without a man. Women's pride does not recognize a family union - marriage, in which the man is the head and his opinion should be the main one. A woman in such a relationship does not recognize the man’s rightness, clearly puts forward her independence as an argument, and seeks to subjugate his will. It is important for her to be a winner in a relationship with unshakable principles. It is unacceptable for a proud woman to sacrifice her own ambitions for the good of the family.

Excessive control, nagging and female irritation over trivial matters - I poison the lives of both. All scandals end only after the man admits his guilt and the female Ego wins. If a man is forced to praise the superiority of his wife for any trivial reason, he feels humiliated. His love fades away - passions rise, and he leaves the family.

What does pride lead to?

Pride is called an inferiority complex. An unhealthy sense of superiority over others does not allow a person to admit his shortcomings and encourages him to prove in every way that he is right - to lie, brag, invent and dissemble. The vain and proud have a developed sense of cruelty, anger, hatred, resentment, contempt, envy and despair - which is characteristic of people who are weak in spirit. The fruits of pride are negative thoughts that give rise to aggressive behavior towards others.

How to get rid of pride?

Pride is called the enemy of one's own happiness. It forms a false opinion about the meaning of a person’s life and deprives him of friends. Pride can destroy a family unit and excludes the opportunity to learn from one’s own mistakes. Overcoming pride is not easy. First, it must be recognized as a negative feeling that must be suppressed and eradicated. But how to deal with pride using specific examples:

recognize the power of the Almighty over yourself, perceive yourself as a grain of sand in the ocean of the Universe; learns from people - notice their efforts, recognize the success of those who have more achievements, take a good example from them; be grateful for help and tips; do not take credit for the achievements of others , do not belittle the importance of other people’s merits; share positive experiences with others; show selfless support excluding praise and gratitude as a basis; find an authoritative person and ask to point out mistakes, shortcomings - provide targeted criticism; do not accept grievances, do not accumulate them in your soul.

Another extreme that does not lead to anything good. Pride and Arrogance directly relate to, or rather to, problems of self-esteem.

I'll start with a question: Why do you think Pride in Christianity is considered a mortal sin and the most serious of all sins? Pride is equivalent in severity to killing another person. Have you ever wondered how many destinies, how many talented and intelligent people were ruined by this companion of success (pride)? How many feelings and relationships are destroyed because of pride?

I want to warn you right away - you should not confuse Pride with Pride, these are radically opposite concepts. Understanding and distinguishing between hubris and pride is worthy of its own article.

What is Pride?

To begin with, let's give some revealing definitions. Why several? Because pride is a very complex and multifaceted flaw and a very dangerous sin.

Pride- this is inflated self-esteem when a person considers himself better than he really is, and also better than all other people. The problem is that this is an inadequate assessment of oneself, which leads to making fatal life mistakes.

Pride- this is disrespect for other people, which manifests itself as arrogance, bragging, ingratitude, inattention to others, etc.

I also liked the Christian definition from Wikipedia; I would call this definition spiritually literate:

Pride differs from simple pride in that a person blinded by pride boasts of his qualities in front of God, forgetting that he received them from Him. This is a person’s arrogance, the belief that he can do everything himself and achieve everything on his own, and not with help or assistance. In pride, a person does not thank God for everything that he has (for example, hearing, sight, life) and receives (for example, food, shelter, children).

Here is another definition that I consider adequate and reflects the essence of pride:

Pride (lat. superbia) or Arrogance is the desire to consider yourself independent and the only reason for all the good that is in you and around you.

Hypertrophied and expanded Pride turns into delusions of grandeur.

Basic programs (installations) of pride, with which you need to say goodbye (replace with adequate beliefs). What a person stricken with pride usually thinks and says:

“I am the best, the most beautiful, the smartest, the most worthy, the most”

“I am better than others, smarter, stronger, cooler, etc.”, “And this means that I should have more than others, I have the right to this, I am better...”, “And that means others and the whole world for me owe much more than I owe to them and this world”, “And if I’m so cool and everyone owes me, then it’s not necessary to thank them, they owe me... it’s not necessary to appreciate them, they should appreciate me, I’m on much better than all of them…”, etc.

Sound familiar? I think it's familiar. If you are honest enough with yourself, you will remember examples in your life when you thought this way and how it ultimately ended. Think about examples of other people who behaved in a similar way, and what your reaction was to their attitude and behavior.

How is pride usually formed or where does it come from?

1. Incorrect upbringing. For example, when parents inspire their child from childhood - “you are the best”, “the smartest”, “the best”, “you are better than others”. It’s especially bad when it’s completely untrue and not supported by life. That is, the child has not done anything good, but he is praised and praised. When rewards are undeserved.

2. When a person is not trained to work with his Self-Esteem, is not trained to work with his shortcomings, treat them correctly and eliminate them. Then, with the first success, he begins to think that it is he who is so great, and not God, the Universe and Fate who favor him. That is, when a person takes credit for all the merits and successes, that all this is only thanks to him alone, his uniqueness and genius.

There are other causes of Pride, but we will look at the fight against them in more detail in the article - “How to get rid of Pride.”

Problems that Pride Causes

I think everyone has noted that when a person is driven by Pride, it is unpleasant, and often unbearable, to communicate and deal with him. Is it really unpleasant when you are treated with arrogance and arrogance, like a second-class citizen? Everyone doesn't like this attitude.

When a person begins to feel pride, it becomes difficult to communicate with him, normal people who respect themselves begin to shun such a person and avoid communicating with him in every possible way. In the end, he is left alone, alone with his pride, dissatisfied with all the other people and their behavior.

Many Religions say: Pride is the mother of all other sins. This is indeed true. When a person is overcome by pride, he begins to demand undeserved attention to himself - vain glory, and this is what it is.

A person stricken by pride, in a halo of his own greatness and uniqueness, ceases to see the merits and talents of other people, loses the value of everything he has in life, everything that others do for him. His behavior manifests itself as disrespect, arrogance, arrogance, and in some cases, rudeness and pugnacity. Such a person becomes incredibly suspicious, touchy and conflicted.

If you decide that you or your loved ones need the help of a specialist to cope with this deficiency and build adequate self-esteem -!